The Political Parties of Waste Brinjal

These are some of the political parties of the present day of a fictitious state of Waste Brinjal:

The government is made up of a coalition popularly known as the Theft Front. Leading the pack is the Creating Perfect Election Manipulation (CPEM). Among the other big parties in the Theft Front are the Corrupt Practises Expert (CPE), Backward Flock (BF), and Resisting Forward Progress (RFP). The government of Theft Party has ruled Waste Brinjal for over several decades. For their own benefits, they backed unions: who at every pretext harassed industries, and in some cases, stopped work as well. All for gathering popular votes from the villages. And another standard feature for decades has been opposition to whatever the ruling party at the center does.

The main opposition is a decade old party called the Grasseater party led by Ms. Mega Chaos. Her and her party’s reason for success has been successful emulation of whatever Theft Front had done for years. If Theft Front can rig votes, so can Grasseaters. If Theft Front backed unions organized most of the bus workers, then Grasseater backed unions got majority of the auto workers together. In addition, they oppose almost anything the Theft Front does, and is known to call for the use of Article 356 and President’s rule at the drop of a hat.

Now to the present situation:

The coalition government of Theft Front, after resisting change and industrialization for years, finally wants to catch up with other states. It has taken some steps to make the state investor friendly. But the opposition, out of habit, or out of fear of the ruling party taking all the credit for the state’s development, opposes everything that the government does. The Theft Front’s cause is not helped by some members of the Front itself who opposes some of the moves fearing loss of votes from villages if industrialization happens. On one hand, the state’s Minister of Industries, Mr. Nice Effort, goes to Ruritania to bring business; and on the other hand, a government agency controlled by the Backward Flock refuses to renew a trade license of a major investor from Ruritania.

Even other than industrialization, any change is resisted by the union structure Frankenstein that the Theft Front created. If they want to evict the hawkers who were not there a few years ago and have taken over major parts of the cities, the unions are there to back the hawkers. If the government wants to remove illegal autos and autos which use illegal fuel to curb the pollution problem, again, they can’t, because the unions won’t let that happen.

Now, the question is, where is Waste Brinjal headed?

15 comments:

~ ॐ ~ said...

Now this article should get a place in some of the leading newspapers !!!

I am very impressed with the quality of writing bro !!!

I am said...

This IS a brilliant write up Bohemian!!

Even before I reached the end I was of the opinion that it should go to next weeks Telegraph, HT, TOI BUT THIS NEEDS TO GO PUBLIC...and Om's seems to have suggested the same...

WASTE BRINJAL is headed for a confirmed death IF Nothing is done to get the BYE BYE company BACK!!

Get this OUT.. and do let us know where it went..

ALL the VERY VERY best..

B. O'Hemian said...

Thanks guys. I wrote it out of frustration the other day. If only getting this public could help this state wake up, I would do that; but it won't, so...

deeps79 said...

excellent..........very well written satire piece on the ongoings at Waste Brinjal.....

burf said...

subbu bro, great piece of writing.

and to answer your closing question, it is headed for hell

I am said...

No Doubt that nothing will wake up the sleeping beauty!!

but Letters to the editor mein to chaap hi sakte ho!!

who knows it might draw some attention of someone some where and things might change!!

hua to achiii baat hai, nahi hua to its out there a potential fuel!!

Anyway finally its your call. But everyone I sent this piece appreciated the write up a lot even though it was a simplistic representation of a complicated problem. But it's worth letting it out..

all the best

B. O'Hemian said...

@Deeps
Thanks :)

@Burf
I hope against hope what you wrote is proved wrong. Waiting for a miracle.

@I_am
Appreciate the encouragement. Let me think about it :)

I am said...

glad you are willing to give it a thought, :)

all the best

Aarbee said...

Sab ne sab kuch bol diya. To ab publish to karwa hi do.
Main bhi college mein circulate karun?

B. O'Hemian said...

@RB
Err... you know how I write. Publicity is never my intention.

Sanjit D said...

Hey Shubu!! I've a friend from Haldia, and he thinks Tata moving out of Singur is a moral victory for the people of the region. I was shocked to hear that from a guy who is doing PhD after completing MPhil. The discussion that followed forced me to rethink and support the movement.
Enjoyed ur post.....Sanjit

Butterfly said...

This is the best post on your blog till date!:-D :-D

Everything is just perfect!Such an article surely needs to be appreciated by a large number of people, more than the seven who have left their coments here. Go ahead and get it published in one of the newspapers. Even it does not wake up Waste Brinjal, it'll make the people laugh and making millions smile is also an effective job.:-)

B. O'Hemian said...

@Sanjit
You mean now you think the Tatas should really go? I am intrigued... what were his points?

@Butterfly
Glad that it made you laugh. You think this is the best post on this blog? Gee... thanks :)

Rohit Talwar said...

Dude, this IS a ncie piece man. Hilarious, gets tragic as soon as the truth hits you. Please share it with more people, at least online, somehow. Email, forward, whatever.

And yes, to say that we are all headed to hell is, you know, already been told.

B. O'Hemian said...

@RT
:)